Saturday, December 02, 2006

anniversaries

Today is December 2nd, exactly one year since the very first post on this blog. One year since I left my awful, drunk wife CB and decided to put all my extra energy into this stony planet to keep me sane while I couch surfed and studied for exams and dealt with the guilt and grief attendant to leaving my "marriage," my home and my (seriously? yes) stepkids.

Wow. One whole year. The blog has changed shape a lot since then, and my identity as a blogger has also shifted dramatically. In fact, my identity as a writer has really emerged as I (finally) reinstated an almost daily writing practice (journaling doesn't count, for me) and then felt the pressure of a daily readership. What an awesome thing blogging has been for me! It has helped me write more concisely, more quickly, and it has introduced me to the power of volume. (Ie: daily writing adds up to tons and tons of material.) If it wasn't for blogging, I never would've felt capable of something like Nano. Hell, if it wasn't for blogging, I never would've read about Nano on other people's blogs!

Awhile back, Sara Heppola wrote a much-talked about column for somebody (New York Times maybe?) called "Why I Quit Blogging," bemoaning the giant drain that her daily blogging had become. She had started blogging to help become a better writer but, in the process of blogging, she had stopped putting energy into her regular writing and had, consequently, never bothered to write that great american novel that had been knocking around inside of her. I am happy to say I have had the opposite experience of blogging so far. Although, it's only been a year. Give me some time and maybe I will start to loathe it. I'll check back in next year.

Another anniversary worth noting, at least for me: December 2nd, 2001, 6am EST, my brother Isaac died. I have been planning for weeks now to write something about him today. Planning, actually, to use this day each year to write something new about him. To constantly revisit his memory and assess the evolving meaning of the death of a sibling in my life. But, sadly, I don't have it in me today. I've spent another several hours sitting here at the computer working on my last paper of law school (that deserves caps: MY LAST PAPER OF LAW SCHOOL) and now my brain hurts and I'm excited about getting over to SK's for some more R n R. I'm sorry, Boo, my tribute to you will have to wait a couple of days. Hold tight. I promise to get to it soon.

4 Comments:

Blogger stumptown dreamer said...

wow a lot happens in a year..

a year ago i was single, hardly looking, coming out of a weird hobby relationship...
then you in the office, sharing horoscope advice, talking about plans for being single and having time and space to yourself for discoveries...

.... and making your precious suggestions for tea or coffee or movie...

alot can happen
alot has

5 years too - Isaac doing his thing...
hope he's enjoying the travels....

if he's back doing another round, i hope it's going well:-)

see you soon

5:03 PM  
Blogger Dharma said...

Time is funny thing.

As to your brother, you will write when it's there. When I wrote a few weeks ago about my grandfather's suicide I realized it is the first time I have ever written about it.

8:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Happy happy blog-aversary. Sounds like it's been an incredibly difficult and yet also a banner year for you. Huzzah! I look forward to reading more about your brother Isaac.

10:34 AM  
Blogger reasonably prudent poet said...

thanks peeps. you are my core three readers who also comment. you keep me going.

2:59 PM  

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