because i just can't leave it alone
(...and because I just can't bring myself to study my income tax. sorry bojack...)
I called mog for the first time in over a week today. I was sitting in my car outside my favorite study-coffeeshop listening to This American Life on OPB. It was good. It was about gangsters and the particular story that was on at that moment was told by a woman whose father had been some big mob guy in Vegas when she was a little girl. It was so interesting, but they took a quick break and I made myself turn it off so I could go in and study. And then, before I even thought about it, I was dialing up mog.
It was in my head to do, I guess, because I'd had this dream about her last night. I dreamed we were chatting about this big formal function she went to the other night with her friend. The formal function was real, but in the dream, she was explaining that she'd really enjoyed it and especially liked the way she felt in the black dress and heels she'd bought for it. So, so strange, because this is not how I imagine she really felt about the event or the black dress or the heels, all of which exist.
She answered on the second ring. I asked what she was doing and, of course, she was listening to This American Life. Funny. I said "I'll let you go, then, because I was just listening to it and I know it's really good. So you should finish." She told me she'd call me from her babysitting job tonight. Now it's tonight and I don't think she will call, I don't even really *want* her to call at this point because I don't like talking on the phone and I don't want to do it right now. But the symbolic act of calling, what I think it would mean if she did call, is too important. So... I don't want to talk to her, but I really want her to call. What's that about?
I called mog for the first time in over a week today. I was sitting in my car outside my favorite study-coffeeshop listening to This American Life on OPB. It was good. It was about gangsters and the particular story that was on at that moment was told by a woman whose father had been some big mob guy in Vegas when she was a little girl. It was so interesting, but they took a quick break and I made myself turn it off so I could go in and study. And then, before I even thought about it, I was dialing up mog.
It was in my head to do, I guess, because I'd had this dream about her last night. I dreamed we were chatting about this big formal function she went to the other night with her friend. The formal function was real, but in the dream, she was explaining that she'd really enjoyed it and especially liked the way she felt in the black dress and heels she'd bought for it. So, so strange, because this is not how I imagine she really felt about the event or the black dress or the heels, all of which exist.
She answered on the second ring. I asked what she was doing and, of course, she was listening to This American Life. Funny. I said "I'll let you go, then, because I was just listening to it and I know it's really good. So you should finish." She told me she'd call me from her babysitting job tonight. Now it's tonight and I don't think she will call, I don't even really *want* her to call at this point because I don't like talking on the phone and I don't want to do it right now. But the symbolic act of calling, what I think it would mean if she did call, is too important. So... I don't want to talk to her, but I really want her to call. What's that about?
posted by reasonably prudent poet at 6:07 PM
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