glimpses of absurdity
1.) My mom called. That, in and of itself, is pretty absurd. My mom's a lunatic. I told her I started kayaking and she said "That's dangerous! You gotta watch out for bears!!"
What the fuck is wrong with my mother?
2.) I sat in on a couple of job interviews for open positions at my place of employment today. Job interviews, in and of themselves, (like my mother) are pretty absurd. People have to come in and look awesome and convince you to hire them. The first guy we interviewed was pretty cool. The chick, however...
We told her that we work primarily with the homeless, mentally ill population, a population she admittedly had not worked with in the past. So we asked her how she felt about this population, specifically, we asked how she felt waiting downstairs in the milieu before her interview. She grinned this ridiculous grin and said, "I felt uncomfortable. I admit it, I didn't know what to expect. But you know, I'm a very strong Christian believer, and I just thought how Jesus came to help the sinners and the people who needed help, not the people who didn't need help, and that really helped me through it."
Everything about that sentence is fucked up. That's all I'm saying.
3.) Later in that same interview, we asked the chick to give us an example from her current job (teaching kids with autism) of a crisis situation in which she intervened. "Oh!" she said, "Just today I was working with Billy in the classroom and he had a meltdown because there was a loud noise. He threw himself into the floor and was crying. Then he started stabbing the teacher in the leg with a vibrator."
It took my mind about three seconds to catch up and think "did she just say 'vibrator'?"
Yes. She did. And she said it a few more times without the slightest acknowledgment that a vibrator isn't something you usually talk about in a job interview, regardless of the fact that it is apparently a useful tool to help kids with autism... which still doesn't make it sound any better...
...and stabbing the teacher with it? Did she really have to say that? I don't know how I kept myself from cracking up.
I wonder how Jesus feels about giving autistic kids vibrators to play with...?