nancy drew and the case of the missing...
...sickly iris? Or big chunks of my brain??
So, here's the story. A couple weeks ago, while tending to the lovely potted flowers on the steps outside my door, I noticed a suspicious circle in the cement. The kind of water mark that a potted plant might leave if said plant had been there a long time and was suddenly removed.
I scratched my little chin and thought, "hmmm.... am I missing a plant...???" Then, looking up and down at the plants in front of me, I easilly concluded that I wasn't missing anything. All plants present and accounted for.
Now, just last night as I was walking to my house from the bus stop, like a bolt of lightening from a clear blue sky, I remembered this plant I used to have. A sickly iris that I had grown from a chunk of root I found laying on the sidewalk last summer. I'd walked by that discarded root for three days, then I couldn't resist. I picked it up, brought it home and put it in a glass of water. Pretty soon, the root had rootlets and was sending up leaf shoots and then I had a full-blown plant. Some kind of iris.
Well, that little iris hit a point in it's growth when it stopped looking so healthy and started to wan a little. I probably should've repotted it, but at the time I thought it just needed more light than my dark, basement hovel affords, so I put it outside on my front steps where I continued to monitor it's progress.
I guess I didn't monitor it closely enough, though, because it's GONE! Totally, completely gone.
So there are two mysteries here:
1.) Who would walk off with a sickly little iris, especially when there are much cooler, prettier potted plants nearby?? It just doesn't make any sense. I don't really mind that it's gone, I just want to know the story. Why?? Who??? When.... ? Which leads to mystery number...
2.) What the fuck is wrong with me that it has taken me probably WEEKS, if not MONTHS, to notice this plant was missing??? And how was it that I stood there looking at the water mark on the cement, scratched my chin and then concluded that nothing was missing?? Am I brain damaged?? I nursed that plant to life from a tiny chunk of root and I just woke up one day and didn't even notice that it was gone??? Should I be worried about my grey matter?? Jesus.
So, here's the story. A couple weeks ago, while tending to the lovely potted flowers on the steps outside my door, I noticed a suspicious circle in the cement. The kind of water mark that a potted plant might leave if said plant had been there a long time and was suddenly removed.
I scratched my little chin and thought, "hmmm.... am I missing a plant...???" Then, looking up and down at the plants in front of me, I easilly concluded that I wasn't missing anything. All plants present and accounted for.
Now, just last night as I was walking to my house from the bus stop, like a bolt of lightening from a clear blue sky, I remembered this plant I used to have. A sickly iris that I had grown from a chunk of root I found laying on the sidewalk last summer. I'd walked by that discarded root for three days, then I couldn't resist. I picked it up, brought it home and put it in a glass of water. Pretty soon, the root had rootlets and was sending up leaf shoots and then I had a full-blown plant. Some kind of iris.
Well, that little iris hit a point in it's growth when it stopped looking so healthy and started to wan a little. I probably should've repotted it, but at the time I thought it just needed more light than my dark, basement hovel affords, so I put it outside on my front steps where I continued to monitor it's progress.
I guess I didn't monitor it closely enough, though, because it's GONE! Totally, completely gone.
So there are two mysteries here:
1.) Who would walk off with a sickly little iris, especially when there are much cooler, prettier potted plants nearby?? It just doesn't make any sense. I don't really mind that it's gone, I just want to know the story. Why?? Who??? When.... ? Which leads to mystery number...
2.) What the fuck is wrong with me that it has taken me probably WEEKS, if not MONTHS, to notice this plant was missing??? And how was it that I stood there looking at the water mark on the cement, scratched my chin and then concluded that nothing was missing?? Am I brain damaged?? I nursed that plant to life from a tiny chunk of root and I just woke up one day and didn't even notice that it was gone??? Should I be worried about my grey matter?? Jesus.
posted by reasonably prudent poet at 10:12 AM
4 Comments:
I have a friend (lives nowhere near Portland) who would definitely kidnap a plant or animal that she thought wasn't getting proper care. Her PETA membership I get. This Plant Rescue Squad thing she does: very weird.
you've just been busy the past few months. don't worry about it. you're not losing your mind.
i like the new pic. your new hair and shirt look very nice.
melinda -- i'm hoping it was some nosy do-gooder who thought they could give it a better life. i'd rather imagine it being pampered somewhere rather than thrown against a wall in a random act of plant violence.
scg -- thanks. :-)
zuhn -- so true. that explains the smell...
I had someone steal an oak leaf hydrangea out of my front yard. It was planted in the DIRT.
An acquaintance who has a nursery business with her husband has had their greenhouse broken into numerous times - japanese maples, particularly, frequently stolen. (And insurance rarely covers plants, even when it's your business.) People are tacky.
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